Alright, buckle up. Cupioromantic might sound like something you’d read in a medical textbook, but it’s actually a term that a lot of folks still don’t quite get. I mean, I had to Google it a couple of times to make sure I wasn’t misreading some bizarre new dating app lingo. Anyway, here’s the kicker: Cupioromantic refers to someone who wants a romantic relationship but doesn’t experience romantic attraction. It’s kind of like wishing for a pet rabbit without actually feeling a need to pet it. Confused? Yeah, me too at first.
What’s the Deal with Cupioromantic?
So, here’s the breakdown. People who identify as Cupioromantic aren’t feeling those butterfly-in-the-stomach moments when they meet someone. But. They still really want to be in a relationship. Sounds odd, right? Like ordering a pizza without feeling hungry—but sticking around because you like the idea of it. And that’s totally okay.
You’ve got those classic romantic emotions people talk about, right? The “I can’t stop thinking about you” type of thing. But for Cupioromantic folks? Nah. They just don’t get that spark. That doesn’t mean they don’t still dream of dinner dates, hand-holding, or maybe binge-watching Netflix with someone on the couch. In fact, they might even actively go looking for relationships, despite not feeling the romance vibe. Wild, huh?
Cupioromantic vs. Aromantic: The Battle of the No-Romantics
Here’s where things get a little… confusing. Aromantic and Cupioromantic are not the same thing. Seriously. Let’s clear that up. An Aromantic person doesn’t feel romantic attraction, like, at all. Zero. Zilch. Nada. They could still be perfectly happy with deep friendships or even a little physical intimacy, but that heart-racing, love-at-first-sight nonsense? Not happening.
Cupioromantics, though? Yeah, they still want that romance. They just don’t feel it. It’s like saying you want to be a baker but have zero idea how bread rises. There’s the desire, just not the innate feeling. Imagine walking into a bakery and thinking, “You know what? I’m really craving a croissant,” even though you have no idea what croissants are supposed to taste like. That’s Cupioromantic in a nutshell.
Why Would You Want a Relationship if You Don’t Feel Attraction?
I’ve got friends who are Cupioromantic, and let me tell you, explaining that you want a relationship but don’t feel the romance is like explaining that you love pizza but are allergic to cheese. It doesn’t make a lot of sense until you sit down with them. For some people, the idea of having a romantic partner is less about attraction and more about the emotional benefits—companionship, stability, affection. Maybe it’s a desire for closeness or to build something that looks like what society tells us “should” be our relationships.
Plus, there’s always the societal pressure. When everyone around you is posting couple pics or getting sappy about anniversaries, it’s hard to shake that feeling that maybe you’re missing out on something. Even if you’re not feeling romantic attraction, the longing for that connection still sits there, nagging at you. Y’know, like how I want to run a marathon one day… but I really only want the medal. Yeah, that’s me, an indoor cat.
What It Feels Like to Be Cupioromantic
Alright, picture this: You’re at a wedding. Everyone’s sobbing over the vows, and you’re just kind of sitting there thinking, “I mean, yeah, that’s nice… but, uh, I don’t get it?” That’s how some Cupioromantic folks feel. It’s not that they don’t want a relationship—it’s that the idea of falling in love the way movies portray it just doesn’t make sense to them. They’re not feeling the “spark,” but still, the idea of being in a relationship is hella appealing.
It can be hard to explain, especially when people are talking about chemistry and all that. It’s like having a blueprint of a house you really want but not being able to build it because you can’t figure out what a hammer does. You still want to live in the house; you’re just missing some parts of the process.
The Struggles of Cupioromantic Life
Look, being Cupioromantic in a world that places so much emphasis on romantic love can be frustrating. I remember the first time my friend explained Cupioromanticism to me. I thought they were joking. “So you want a relationship but don’t actually like anyone romantically?” Yeah, sounds like my failed attempts at gardening last spring. (Remember when I killed that succulent by overwatering it? Yeah, good times.)
It’s not easy being in a world where romantic attraction is considered “normal,” and then you realize your internal compass is telling you something totally different. People might ask you why you’re in a relationship if you don’t feel the same emotional connection as everyone else, which can feel a little like being asked why you like pineapples when you don’t actually love the taste of pineapple. I mean, what is the deal with pineapple on pizza anyway?
More Than Just Words: The Desire for Connection
I’ll be the first to admit: there are times when I don’t feel the romantic attraction everyone talks about, but the idea of being loved and cared for in a relationship? Heck yes. For Cupioromantics, this feeling isn’t strange or odd, even if it’s different from what other people experience. Everyone craves connection, right? Whether it’s through friendship, family, or romantic love.
And let’s not ignore society’s expectations. We’re fed this idea that everyone should fall in love at some point. People even ask about your “love life” in conversations like it’s a requirement, like asking about the weather. “So, when are you getting a boyfriend?” Uh, well, I don’t even feel the romantic thing… but sure, let me check my calendar for that.
The Good, the Bad, and the Confusing
I’ll be honest: the first time I heard about Cupioromanticism, I thought it was just another label meant to complicate the already complicated world of dating. But then, like a lot of things, I learned the hard way. Labels help people understand themselves and each other. They aren’t about making things more difficult. It’s the opposite. It’s about finding words to express something you might not be able to describe otherwise.
And hey, this might sound crazy, but the more we talk about different romantic orientations, the better we all get at understanding the weird, wonderful, and confusing ways people connect with each other. It’s not all about love at first sight and heart-shaped emojis. It’s about human connection, whatever form that might take.
Cupioromanticism: A Little Love for the Label
I think what makes Cupioromanticism so interesting is that it shows how many different ways there are to experience love and connection. Some people need to feel romantic attraction; others don’t, but still crave that emotional closeness. It’s not better or worse—just different. And that’s wicked cool.
Fast forward past a few years of confusion (and maybe a failed attempt at dating), and you might find yourself in a relationship that feels exactly right, even if it’s not what you imagined. Just like when I learned how to properly prune my rose bush—took a couple of tries, but it happened. No shame in that.
Once people start wrapping their heads around these kinds of relationships, they can better understand each other and embrace differences. Because ultimately, isn’t that what love is about? Understanding, patience, and connection? Yeah, I think so too.
